There are many different reasons for you to feel overwhelmed. Whether you’re a mum, juggling the demands of your children’s needs as well as your own, or whether your work has become a stressor. Life often gives us too many plates to juggle. Feeling overwhelmed? Here’s what to do next…
1. Brain Dump
When I am feeling utterly overwhelmed, I brain dump. That involves getting a big piece of paper, some coloured pens and then dumping everything that’s on my mind onto the paper. I can categorise it into to-do’s, worries, thoughts, ideas etc. Then that way I can move forward.
2. Write a List
Write a list of everything you have to do. From your brain dump, you should be able to identify what on there that you need to do practically.
When writing the list, colour code the importance of the tasks for the day. Red is your MUST do’s. Orange, would be good to do then finally your green is your would like to do’s.
For the next week, try and do 3 red tasks each day until they are done, then work through your orange and so on. As someone who works from home, I often have to prioritise my work and my tasks on a daily basis. This is how I achieve it.
3. For those worries…
I have in a previous blog talked about ‘Worry Time’. This is a really useful tool when it comes to combatting mental health, as it helps you to control your worries rather than allowing them to take over your life. You can read about ‘Worry Time’ here.
I have used ‘Worry Time’ whenever my worries overwhelm me. It really is a great method of organising your worries, so that you feel less overwhelmed day to day.
Write these down as green to do’s on your list. Or if they are turning into worries, add them to your worry time.
5. Is outsourcing or delegating possible?
In life we can be juggling too many plates. Are you able to outsource or delegate any of those things?
For example, if the housework is getting too much, can you get a cleaner in once a fortnight? Or draft up a family chores list so that your children or partner can help you out? You’d be surprised at how capable children are. I get my boys to load up the washing machine, make their beds and sweep after dinner. They also tidy the cushions up and do other random jobs throughout the day. These may be small chores, but they help so much.
When it comes to work, can you talk to a boss and let them know how you are struggling with everything? Or if you run your own business, can you outsource? For me, I have a bookkeeper to take care of the financial elements.
Think about things you can outsource or delegate. When it comes to worries, have you got someone you trust to sit down with you and come up with a plan of action to combat those worries?
6. Keep organised
There are many ways you can organise yourself in life. For example, a meal plan will help you to keep track of your intended meals each day and help you to write your weekly or monthly shopping list. Whereas writing and sticking to a budget will help you to prioritise your finances, reducing the likelihood of this then becoming a worry further down the line. You can also keep a diary to organise your social life, family commitments, appointments and work life.
Keeping organised will help you to lessen the overwhelmed feelings. These seem like simple things to do, but often when life becomes too much, they fall at the way side. Try your best to keep on top of them so things don’t pile up.
Don’t forget to breathe…
The feeling of overwhelm can be a bit much at times. So, don’t forget to breathe. Go through my list above and try to implement one of these a week for the next few weeks. Slow and steadily, you can combat that overwhelmed feeling and start to regain control in your life. I hope you get on ok.
This is a question I often used to ask myself. I could feel the weight of anxiety swamping me. Suddenly each evening I felt the dreaded Sunday night feeling… there was no break from it all. Everything made me anxious. “How can I stop mental health taking over my life?” After years I managed to put tools and methods in place which helped answer this question. I will go through these below.
1. Learning to let go…
Learning to let go is really difficult. It’s taking that great leap into the unknown, trying to forget all the questions that are currently swarming and buzzing in your brain. Everything inside you wants to hold onto the anxiety and worry over a situation, because it gives you that ounce of control that feels lacking in other areas of your life.
But this is where your brain is lying to you. It thinks that things will become out of control if you let go of the control of this worry. It’s wrong. When you let go, you become more in control. More in control of your thoughts, your feelings, your future. You become more mindful. Sometimes, it helps to write a letter, or brain dump your thoughts on to paper then screw it up and take a big breath. Then try to redirect your thoughts back to the moment.
Be gentle with yourself and allow those negative thoughts and feelings to flow through you. Be with it. Then, focus on self care and creating positive mantras to combat these thoughts and feelings. Then once the situation, thoughts and feelings are in the past, learn to keep them there and stop going over the same issues in your brain. The next tip will help you to focus on the present moment.
2. Try mindfulness.
Learning about mindfulness was a game changer for me. It was fascinating to find out how the brain works and why we go through the thought processes that we go through.
It helps you to stop dwelling on the past, helping your brain to cease going over and over everything that drags you down and causes you to feel regretful and other negative emotions. It also helps to stop you from speeding your thoughts into the future, worrying about things that may or may not even come. Mindfulness helps you to learn to let go.
This may sound a bit odd… but actually taking up a hobby, something you enjoy will help give you some good distractions in life. It gives you focus on something that boosts joy in your life.
If you currently don’t have a hobby, or don’t know how to start, then do some research or try dipping your toes into a few new things. It could be to do with sports, running, cycling. You could get creative; like sewing, cross stitch or knitting. Why not try making models? Or paint by numbers? It could be as simple as colouring in books. Anything that allows you some peace, and something for you.
Having something positive to focus on will make the world of difference.
When your life feels too much, try some escapism. Grab a book in a genre that you love and get lost inside the pages. Binge watch a TV series which is uplifting, and allows you to forget your own worries and stresses for a few hours each day. Try watching some uplifting films.
Escapism is a great way to just forget for a little bit. And sometimes that’s all you need for anxiety to not take over your whole life.
5. Spend time with family and friends.
Spend time doing something relaxing, or fun and adventurous with family and friends. It will also give you a chance to turn to them and talk through some of your worries and anxieties. Let them support you, but also ask questions back about their life and see if you can do something kind for them in return. This will also help with the overwhelming anxious thoughts and feelings.
By being surrounded by those you love, it will help to boost your endorphins and shrink those unwanted thoughts and feelings. Don’t bottle things up either- they are there because they love you.
The final tip I have for you to help mental health from not taking over your life, is to practise as much self care as possible. This means drinking plenty of water, eating healthily and getting in exercise. It also means allowing yourself time each day to do something for you, whether that’s spending time doing your new hobby, taking a bath or phoning a friend. Do one thing a day that helps to refill your own cup.
By fuelling your body with the right foods, you are getting all the right nutrients as well as showing yourself that you are worthy of this self care. Keep in touch with people and talk about your feelings, and don’t forget to ask for help when you need it.
I hope that these 6 tips have helped you to not feel so overwhelmed. There are plenty of things you can do to help train your brain from negative thinking patterns to positive ones. Just like physical health, we all have mental health. It is a part of our lives but we can stop it from taking over by making sure we take care of it and focus on the good in life.
What do you do to help fill your cup? How do you add positivity into your life? Leave a comment, I’d love to hear from you.
We all know that by doing acts of kindness, you are doing something good in the world. Also, in doing the act of kindness, it should be a selfless act, without expectancy of anything in return. However, did you know that by doing these acts of kindness, it can help to reduce your anxiety? Below, we will explore this topic.
You can raise your confidence
By being kind to others, it will naturally give you a feel-good boost, even when you aren’t expecting anything in return. Random acts of kindness are a nice thing to do, they are kind, thoughtful and selfless. All of these are great traits to have as an individual.
By regularly completing these acts of kindness, even without anyone else knowing, you will recognise these beautiful traits in yourself and it will help to raise your self-esteem and boost your confidence. You are kind, you are thoughtful. By doing these acts, you are proving this to yourself- even when it didn’t need proving!
It forms a healthy distraction….
When you suffer with anxiety, it can be hard to focus on anything other than the intrusive anxiety riddled thoughts. By getting busy doing something kind for others, you are giving your brain something else to focus on. This will be an easy transition for your brain as we naturally like to please others, so by actively seeking this we are pleasing ourselves.
Distractions are hard to come by, and often we can get distracted by things which are not a healthy distraction, such as drinking. By doing something kind, something active for others, it is a healthy distraction. One that will bring both you and them joy.
Focus on the good, and reduce the noise of the bad….
By putting your attention on something good, it will help train your brain to focus on these things. Our brains get used to habits, and if you have a habit of dwelling on negative things, then you will end up being drawn to all the bad stuff in life. However, if you train your brain to focus on the good, this will help you with your battle with anxiety and depression.
It will slowly but surely help reduce the noise of the bad. Think about it this way; by looking at life with kind eyes and a kind heart, you will be more in tune with picking this up around you too. Life will over time become lighter, and you will wake up looking forward to all the good that surrounds us.
I hope that this blog has inspired you to do some random acts of kindness. Adding light to others lives will help you to feel less anxious overtime, recognising that life doesn’t have to be full of dread and worry all the time. It can be filled with hope and kindness.
We are a few weeks into what I believe is a mixture of being in the Big Brother house, living Groundhog day and an apocalypse movie all rolled into one. It can really get to you when you look ahead and wonder how long we will be stuck here for. But, it is important to stay positive. I’ve decided to come up with a list of ideas of things you can do in isolation.
Binge on some boxsets.
I never usually have time to watch too much Netflix. Often, my list gets too full I can’t add any more on. Now is the time to indulge in the TV and get through my list. Have you got an endless list of films and shows that you’ve not yet had a chance to watch? Now’s the time.
Some great ones that I have viewed have been;
Love is Blind. This is so cringe-worthy but also hard not to watch. I got so hooked on it last weekend and watched it all within a matter of days.
The Tiger King. This is a new Netflix documentary. It’s less about tigers, more about complex lifestyle choices mixed with enemies.
Dark Tourist. This is also a documentary, but each episode is based on a dark tourist spot. My favourite episode has to be where they explore Japan where the Tsunami hit a few years ago.
Friday Night Dinners. This is the perfect thing to watch for some light comic relief. I’m so happy they have released a new series.
Read some books.
How many times have you wished to sit down and curl up with a book? Now you can. Challenge yourself to see how many you can get through during this time. Post your recommendations below.
By exercising, you are keeping yourself healthy and fit. Exercise also helps to boost your mental health as well as your physical health. If you are allowed, then take a walk or run outside. If not, try finding some YouTube videos to give you guidance for a work out.
Whether you have children or not, Joe Wicks is hosting free live PE sessions for the nation each morning at 9 am that you could join in with. Or search his YouTube channel and you will find more inspiration and videos.
Have you got an exercise bike that usually collects dust? Drag it out and start using it. You will thank yourself in months to come that you stayed active.
Get Baking or Cooking.
Now is the perfect time to start cooking using different ingredients. Rather than just popping something in the oven, why not look online for some new recipes and take the time and care of preparing a meal from scratch? This can be such a nice activity to do each day.
You can also get into baking. Bake yourself some nice tasty treats to enjoy throughout your week. You never know, you may even become the next star baker.
Here are a few things that we have cooked and baked recently:
Have you always wanted to do something for yourself that gets you in touch with your creative side? Maybe you’ve always loved drawing, or playing a musical instrument but you never usually get the time to do so. Now is the perfect time. Here are some of the creative hobbies I have enjoyed over the time:
Colouring In. Colouring in can be a very mindful activity. It helps you to drown your endless worries and thoughts, instead focusing on the beautiful colours in front of you. And not forgetting to try and keep within the lines!
Sewing. I was gifted a unicorn sock pack for Christmas from my brother and his wife. I started it weeks ago but it remained unfinished. But now I finally have time to finish sewing and completing it.
Cross stitch. I have always loved cross stitch. It calms me like no other hobby and I always love seeing my finished pieces. I have been making some time for this peaceful craft again.
Be Youthful and Play Video Games.
I have to say this has been one of my favourite past times of isolation. I have loved getting the Nintendo Switch out and letting my inner child free. I never usually can justify spending hours engrossed in a game when I usually have so much to do. But this has been the ultimate escapism for me. The games I’ve enjoyed are;
Pokemon Sword on the Nintendo Switch. I love the storyline to this game and now I am making it my mission to fill and complete my Pokedex. My boys love watching my play too so that’s been a bonus.
Mario Kart. A bit of harmless fun, I have spent hours whizzing around the race tracks and escaping from the real world for a while.
Two Point Hospital. Who can remember Theme Hospital? This game is essentially the same and I am hooked.
Plague Inc. I used to have this on my phone, but I decided to download it again. It’s very apt for the current situation, and it is a bit addictive too.
Have a Clear Out.
Now is the perfect time to go through your house and have a clear out. You can choose a room a week, gut it and then decide what you need to do. Does it need a deep clean? A paint? Or maybe it could do with some new home touches- like a new storage solution, or a new wall canvas. Now is the best time to get your home up to scratch.
Think of those jobs that you never usually have time to do in the home- NOW is that time.
Reflect on life.
This isn’t time to dwell, but it is a great time to reflect. How was life going for you? Was there something that you’d love to change now? Now is a great time to reflect on where you’re at in your life and where you want to go.
Perhaps your job has been getting you down, you could always use this time to job hunt, or broaden your skills and knowledge. Is there an online course you could take up? This is a great time to get studying and learn something new, then you can use this for a job hunt further down the line.
Or maybe you had toxic relationships or friendships? There is nothing more cleansing than having to distance yourself from everyone. It is now that you can really reflect on who is important in your life and who is not. Then when we are able to get back to ‘normal’ life, you will find it easier to stay away from those that bring you down.
Whatever was bringing you down and affecting you negatively in life, this is the best time to distance yourself from it and never go back. However, if you equally feel like something is lacking in life, now is the best time to consider how to get that in your life.
Touch base with loved ones.
Calls and FaceTime is what has been getting me through these past two weeks. I have tried to call or video call friends each day, if not a couple of times a day and it has made the world of difference. Every time I get to talk to a friend, or family member, it helps me to feel more connected to them and it really boosts my spirits.
I really miss seeing my friends in person, but this time has given me a chance to really reflect on what amazing people I have in my life and I know we are going to have the best time on the other side of this. In the mean time, I am thoroughly enjoying every phone and video call we have. Try scheduling some calls into your days.
Plan for your future.
As mentioned above, this is a great time to plan for the future. Is there a skill you want to take up? A holiday destination you want to go to? Plan for what you want life to look like when we get out of this.
Do you want to be more or less social? Take up a new hobby? Find a new job or career?
What do you want to do to treat yourself and your family after this? Where is the first place you will go?
Although we can’t put a date in our diaries for anything, we can still write a list of plans that we want to do.
Catch up with life whilst practising self care.
How many times in the past year have you wished for life to slow down? Before this, I was always so busy and I kept saying to myself, “Next week life will slow down and I can spend time on myself”. Only that never happened.
Until all of a sudden, life was forced to slow down.
Although I am now juggling work and children, I have still got a little extra time on my hands and I am still able to begin practising self care more regularly. I have started going on a daily run. This is something I would never have had the time or chance to do.
What self care can you partake in? Start today. You will soon feel a huge difference and hopefully going forward, it will soon become routine so that when life does resume, we still prioritise it.
There is something quite magical about being still and observing life as it is. Or just being still outside in the garden and noticing nature around us. Nature is healing. Earth is healing.
It is deeply heartbreaking that so many people are suffering or losing their lives in these upsetting and turbulent times. It is time to be still, to acknowledge everything we should be thankful and grateful for. To take a big breath. This is life, this is history we are living. We are brave, we can get through this.
I hope that this blog post has given you some ideas on what to do during this time of isolation. I seem to have a few good days, followed by a few very down days. It’s only natural for our feelings to be turbulent and all over the place, just like life is. Ever since I have suffered with anxiety, I really struggle to adapt to change. The only thing I can do is take one day at a time and focus on what I can control; and that’s all of the above.
It’s finally Spring time. We can all shake off those winter blues and the chilly frosty cold. The flowers are sprouting from their buds, the trees are starting to bloom and reveal a sea of greenery around us. The mornings and evenings and lighter, and somehow spring time makes life seem a bit lighter. Now, we all know what else Spring brings; time to Spring Clean! So how can you cleanse your life for Spring?
De-Clutter The House
The best place to start is your home. By removing excess material possessions and clutter that have no place in your home anymore, you are also helping to ease mental matter too. You’ll find you will end up with less housework, and therefore less stressing to do each day too. You’ll be surprised that a clutter free home will do to your mind too.
Have you got a lot of toys in the house? Maybe get your children to sit with you and have a toy clear out. You can get them involved in the sorting out and cleaning process, allowing them to understand the need to let things go when they have served their purpose. Don’t forget to teach them refuse, re-use and recycle, too.
Order any new items that you may need for the house. Maybe you need some new towels for the kitchen, or some new storage or organisation solutions. It’ll make you feel more upbeat and positive about your living space.
Prepare The Garden
Over the coming months you will be spending more time outside. That is why it’s a great time to prepare the garden and any furniture you may have for it now. Create a cosy, comforting space for the exterior of your home too.
Getting out in the fresh air is so good for the soul. Fresh air is great for clearing your mind, and gives you a great chance to practise mindfulness, too. Spending time working on the gardening is also a great little hobby to get into this Spring time, allowing you to find escapism and distract your busy mind from negative thoughts.
Start Walking More
Now is the perfect time to stretch your legs and get into a regular regime with walking. It’ll help boost your health and get you outside in the Spring sunshine. This will give you ample opportunity to practise mindfulness yet again.
Not only would regular walking help to boost your physical health, but it will also help your mental health too. Perhaps ask a friend if they fancy joining you, too?
What Upcoming Events Do You Have?
Write a list of your upcoming events this Spring. What will you need? What do you need to buy or book onto?
It’s great to plan ahead. You can prepare yourself for events coming up that perhaps you feel anxious about, whilst ensuring you have everything you need for it too so that when it comes to the date, you are feeling more prepared and in control.
Often anxious feelings come from the sense of not feeling in control, but by planning ahead and looking at upcoming events in advance, you can eliminate this issue and feeling.
Have A Wardrobe Overhaul
Have a clear out of your wardrobe. Then go out and get anything that you may be lacking in, maybe your jeans are starting to get to thin and are threatening to break? Or perhaps you could do with some dresses or clothing ready for Summer time?
Try a slightly different style, you never know; it may transform your confidence. Treat yourself to a new clothing item, as it’s important to show yourself some love and reward yourself for being as awesome as you are.
Now is a great timeto get a better skin care regime. Often our skin has suffered with the harsh winter weather and central heating. You could sort out your make up, and get rid of any that have gone past the expiry date as these could negative affect your skin. Then start a new regime that will have your skin feeling soft and healthy.
Healthy New Habits
Maybe this Spring you could try some healthy new habits. Mindfulness is a great concept to explore and practise. It will help to teach you not to dwell on the past, or fret about the future and learn to be in the here and now.
This Spring I want to be more mindful, to practise body scans when my anxiety is bad and to absorb life more fully. It could be as simple as noticing your surroundings on your walk, rather than letting life walk on by.
Stop dwelling on the past. It’s no good for you or your mental health to dwell about the past. What’s been has been and there is nothing you can change now. Learn to let go of the past, to accept it with kindness and to learn and look forward to the future. Forget about what’s happened over the Winter, and embrace Spring with open arms.
A Virtual Declutter
Spring time isn’t just a great time to declutter your physical space in your home, but it is a great time to have a virtual declutter. Go though your phone to delete all unwanted items. Make sure to check under notes, photo, apps and other content. Have an email clear out too.
Go through your laptop and clear out photos and files. Your phone and technology will work quicker, and more efficiently and you will feel good for the digital clear out.
Plan a refresh for Spring.
Follow some of my ideas above to help declutter your life for Spring. It’s time to organise the next steps in life. To let go of the past, both physically and emotionally and look forward to what life has in store next for you. You will feel so much better after your declutter.
How often do you Spring clean? Is there a certain time of year that you do it? Pop a comment below, I would love to hear from you.
Anxiety has habit of draining our confidence. It can make us feel weak, small and overwhelmed. It’s hard to feel in control at times, when all we want to do is grab our steering wheel in life and be the driver. So, what can make you feel powerful again?
What Is Power?
According to the dictionary, power is ‘the ability or capacity to do something or act in a particular way‘. Feeling powerful doesn’t necessarily have to be a bad thing, not like when people let ‘power go to their head’. It can give us all the confidence to go and chase our dreams, or accomplish our goals. Those with anxiety very rarely feel powerful. Mostly, they feel overwhelmed. They can feel weak and small.
Now when power goes to your head, it’s a whole different matter. In these circumstances, power is more physical- and this happens to those with money, or in management. Or those with a hold on other people. When you use your physical power against people, this is wrong.
But power doesn’t always have to be bad. Power and feeling powerful can be good for your soul and confidence.
What Makes Your Powerful?
Have a think about what makes you feel powerful, like you can soar or conquer the world. For me it’s these things;
I am a Mother
I have a loving family around me
I have some incredible friends around me and I am a good friend back to them
I live independently with my Husband, raising our children who look up to me for support and guidance
I went to uni and achieved a degree
I run my own business
I know I am brave, after 4 broken bones, knees cut open and 6 operations
I am becoming mindful- a great quality to have
I have faced a lot in my past- and I’m not even 30! I know I am strong
The right music and soundtrack can make me feel powerful and motivate me
As can certain quotes
I am me- no one else can be me
Think about moments in your life when you feel in control. Does a certain movie or TV programme motivate you and make you feel powerful? What about music?
Power Up Your Life
As mentioned above, power doesn’t have to be abused or seen as a bad thing. When you feel powerful, and use this in a positive, motivational way, it is a good feeling to experience. Now you’ve thought about what makes you feel powerful, reflect on your list.
Firstly, did you manage to write anything down? Maybe at this moment in time, not a lot makes you feel powerful. That’s ok, but make it your mission to find something. Go through playlists on Spotify and try to find a song that makes you want to kick anxiety’s backside. Or try listening to podcasts that can motivate you.
If you found that there were things, try to introduce them more into your weekly routine. Boost your confidence, motivate yourself and start to let powerful be a concept for you.
As you can see, feeling powerful does not have to be dangerous. It doesn’t have to be seen as being superior or rude. Don’t use people, or power. Don’t abuse it either. Just boost your confidence, and allow yourself to feel powerful, and not weakened by anxiety. Revel in the activities that allow you to feel this and power up your life.
Often when you suffer with anxiety, it is hard to focus on the positives in life. We can get into a negative train of thought, thinking of all that’s lacking, or ‘going wrong’ in life. It’s time to change direction with your thought patterns. Today, I want you to think about what you treasure the most in your life.
What are your top 5s?
Reflect on your life. Take time to sit down and have a pen and paper in front of you. What would you say are the top 5 things in your life? This could be physical or not. Do you have children? A partner? Maybe it’s a physical item you treasure, like a favourite book, or journal.
Write down the top 5 things in your life. And cherish each of these 5 things. Remember how lucky you are to have them. You may find it hard to begin with, you don’t have to sit and do this in one day. You may want to take a few days to mull it over. But when you have your 5, fold the paper in half and pop it in a safe place.
At the end of everyday, grab a pen and paper and write down 3 things that have been good at the end of everyday. When you have done this everyday for a month, you will soon start to retrain your brain into focusing on the positive rather than the negative. They could be big things, or small things. Initially you will find this difficult, but with time it will get easier and you will soon realise that the smaller things in life actually mean the most.
What else do you treasure?
It can be big or small. Here is what I treasure;
My family, extended and immediate.
That my dream came true (as corny as that sounds!)
My ability to write
The British seasons
Special occasions, such as Christmas and Easter
The incredible free education we receive in our childhood and teenage years
The amazing NHS
The ability to use escapism through TV, films, games and books
A good, bent over, tears rolling laugh. I especially treasure my family’s sense of humour and how we always laugh together
Weekend get togethers at my parents
The taste of good food and drinks
Our wedding album
Videos and photos from my beautiful life and my memories with my loved ones
My One Tree Hill, OC, Buffy and Walking Dead boxsets
Now you’ve seen my example, it’s time to reflect and write your own. Use the 2 typical scenarios to help you: If you were a castaway on an island, what 3 items would you take? If there was a fire, what would you rescue other than yourselves? These scenarios may be extreme, but they get you thinking about what your truly treasure. What things in life would you be utterly lost without?
Remind yourself of this list daily
Pop this list on your fridge, against your shower screen or next to your mirror. Everyday for a month look at this list to remind yourself of the treasures you have in your life. It will remind you of what you hold dear. Suddenly it becomes crystal clear that it really is the little things in life that mean the most. That the people around us are our treasures. We don’t have to have oodles of money, the latest gadgets or a flash car. We need love, support and encouragement.
We can treasure escaping through music and films. To be able to escape from our own lives and drown into a whole new world.
What you treasure will say a lot about you. Listen, take note. Then move forwards opening your life up to similar things. Make more memories with loved ones you won’t forget and capture them on a camera, print them out. Indulge in a TV series in the evening to escape if you are going through an anxious stage. Get creative with your treasures.
So January is upon us and we are now in the new year stage. A lot of people find this is a great time to start New Years resolutions and make healthy changes in our lives. Some of us actually manage to achieve these, but some of us may give up a few weeks, or if you’re lucky, months into it. Can it really be ‘new year, new me’? Or is this just a phase that everyone goes through in January only to propel ourselves into feeling more miserable when we don’t achieve our New Years resolutions?
New Years Resolutions
How many times have you made a New Years resolution only to see it fail within a few months? Or how many of you see this as a completely fresh start and motivate yourself constantly to keep going?
I have had many a New Years resolution in the past fail. In fact most have. But one year, I made a New Years resolution/ challenge to bake every single recipe in this baking book I loved. I actually did it! I finished in the December and I felt triumph. Only it clashed with the resolution to lose weight. But I still managed to do it as it was doable- it was something I enjoyed.
Break Your Goals Down
So when you make your New Years resolutions, I would make ones that you will actually be able to achieve. If it’s something you know you will eventually hate or resent, don’t set it. You’ll feel disappointed in yourself if you fail but you’ll be setting yourself up for a failure if you don’t set yourself a realistic resolution in the first place.
Like losing weight, a very common one. It’s so generic. You need to be more specific and make it more do able. Perhaps only allow yourself to eat chocolate/ cake etc on a weekend and eliminate these out of your weekly diet. Perhaps say no to sugary drinks but only allow yourself one a week. If you ban yourself completely from something, you may end up rebelling. But if you set a realistic goal and break it down, you will manage it.
Really think about what you want to achieve and set yourself specific doable bite sized goals. This is the best way to accomplish a resolution or goal. My baking one was broken into doing one bake a week, by the end of the year I had to double and sometimes triple this but it helped with the longevity of the challenge.
Breaking Bad Habits
Another element of the New Year is to eliminate bad or toxic habits. In that respect, I find that sometimes someone just needs a bit of a kick to start the new behaviour. In that respect, the new year is a great signal for that. However, it must be noted that it takes years for a behaviour to form; so it can take a while for it to break.
Be patient with yourself. If you slip up a few times, don’t panic and give up entirely. Be kind to yourself, acknowledge the mistake, (which is easily done as your brain has been wired to behave that way or react that way over years) and keep trying.
We are all constantly changing within ourselves and often we are not the same person we were a few years back. So yes, we can see the New Year as a way to start this change. But make sure that it is a positive one.
Treat yourself and others with kindness, don’t criticise yourself constantly and don’t give up. Find new ways to beat anxiety or depression.
I hope that you all have a wonderful start to 2020 and that if you need it to be a fresh start, that you make it a successful one.